The price for sanity
by Bloody Winged
Summary: And another drabble collection XD This one for my Trowa/Quatre drabbles and ficlets   Please see for warnings every individual chapter
1. The price for sanity

**The price for sanity**  
**Rating:** T  
**Pairing:** hinted at Trowa/Quatre  
**Word Count:** 500  
**Warning:** Angst, mention of character death?  
**Summary:** None of that mattered now. Trowa was dead.  
**Author's Note:** This is my dear auntie's winds_of_water's drabble in response to my angst-drabble prompt post^^ The prompt was: _Trowa/Quatre, The aftermath of Quatre shooting at Tro_

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_**The price for sanity**

Coming out of the shock, he couldn't help himself but stare at the point where only a few minutes before had been the mobile suit of the one person he considered the most important to him.

How… how could he have let this happen? This… couldn't be. This was all just a bad dream, a nightmare, right? It couldn't be true that Trowa was gone – and that he was the one responsible for his death.

Faintly, he remembered the feeling that had possessed him for these past few days. A dark, dangerous place within his own mind, controlling his every thought. It had always been there, but everything that had happened lately had pushed it in the front of his mind, making him crazed with thoughts of revenge. Mixing up his desire for a better world with his darker thoughts; his bloodlust for revenge.

He had always been nice and friendly, polite to everyone he met ever since he realized that in a world so corrupted by those in power, even a little bit of change could make a difference.

But now… this. Trowa… Trowa was…

People had warned him for years that it wasn't good to just keep everything in. However, he always thought that he could deal with it, that he was stronger than that. Had he known back then that one day it would come to _this_… he would rather have stayed out of the war than actually doing this. Even if it would mean to go against his own belief, if it would mean that Trowa were still alive then he would have done it.

He wanted to go out and look for the corpse, make sure that he wasn't letting the other die a slow death. But there were other things he needed to take care of. One of his friends already had died for him. And while no-one could ever compare to Trowa, he had to look after Heero. Trowa had died protecting him and the colony. He would want for Quatre to do the right thing now.

But still… it hurt. Why had Trowa done this? Why had he gotten in his way?

Of course, Quatre knew why. Trowa had – correctly – assumed that he would be the only one able to talk the blond out of whatever he had planned to do. Only… it had been too late. Sanity had still been too far away for him to get a grasp on it in time to change his course of action. Maybe if he had only a few more minutes it would have been enough… but then again, he couldn't be sure if, without Trowa's sacrifice, he really would have come to his senses again. He wanted to say yes, but… would he have, really?

However, none of that mattered now. Trowa was dead. And while Quatre wished for it to be a nightmare, it was reality. Trowa wouldn't come back. He had paid the ultimate price.

A sacrifice for his lover's sanity.

**END**

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I hope you all liked^^  
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	2. Storm

**Storm**  
**Rating:** T  
**Pairing:** Trowa/Quatre  
**Word Count:** 880  
**Warnings:** angst, some sap =_= (so much for angsty drabbles…)  
**Summary:** Trowa and Quatre get surprised by a storm.  
**Author's Note:** This was darthanne's request to my angst-drabble prompt post^^ The prompt was: _Trowa and Quatre please. Prompt: storm. You can take that either literally or figuratively._  
**Extra Note:** Ok, this kinda took about three or four turns on me O_o;; I hope it still makes some sense and that you like how it turned out^^;; (… and I really don't know how that sap managed to sneak in here XD)

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**Storm**

Barely beating the first drops of rain, Trowa closed the door to the small shed behind them. If there ever was a downside to living on earth, then it was the unpredictability of the weather. He liked nature, but he was someone who didn't like getting surprised. And a thunderstorm coming out of no-where while they were taking a walk was something he considered quite the unpleasant surprise.

Especially…

Especially since things haven't been all that great lately anyway.

It wasn't really the fault of either of them. But things have been tense for a while now. Quatre was overworked and even his apparently endless patience finally seemed to run out. There have been more meetings than usual lately and nothing really ever got done. And if there was one thing Quatre Winner didn't like, it was morons wasting his time with useless crap.

Trowa himself also had been a bit more tense than usual. He was growing restless with his new life. He had always been a wanderer and while settling down with the man he loved sounded quite appealing at first, he came to find that the life as Quatre's lover wasn't really exciting. Sure, the blond made time for him whenever he could, but those few, very much appreciated hours he managed to squeeze in every couple of days, barely made up for all the boredom.

Cursing slightly under his breath – Quatre was by far not as innocent as everyone always believed him to be – the blond looked out of the tiny window to see dark clouds overtaking the sky, the first big raindrops already splashing against the glass and making it tremble slightly. They would be lucky if this drafty little shed actually wouldn't let any of the rain in.

Looking around, Trowa could see that there wasn't really anything there to make them comfortable, so he just crossed his arms and leaned against the wall beside the door, leaving the single crate for Quatre to sit down on.

Not that it looked like he would anytime soon. After another annoyed glance at his watch, the blond had started to pace around in the small space, obviously quite agitated. He didn't rant – yet – but it was clear to Trowa that his lover didn't like their situation. Watching him for a few minutes he finally sighed silently and gave Quatre a calm look.

"You should try to relax. There is nothing we can do to get away from here faster if we don't want to get wet," he tried to reason, but he might as well have talked to the wall. While Quatre would never _ignore_ him, the blond also didn't like being reasoned with when it was obvious he didn't care for reason in that very moment. So all he got for his trouble was a dark look before the pacing continued.

The rain pounded against the roof of their little shed, steadily growing louder until it sounded like someone playing the drums right above their head. Trowa felt a slight headache coming up, but he ignored it. He was used to much worse.

"This is ridiculous! I shouldn't waste my time here, I have things to do!" Quatre muttered, finally letting himself fall down on the crate, making it groan softly as the old wood got used to his weight. Seeing the dark scowl on his lover's face, Trowa couldn't help the small smile.

"Maybe you should take this as a sign to take a break? You've hardly taken off more than a few hours from work for months now. You could use it," he suggested.

Groaning, Quatre leaned back on his hands.

"And how am I supposed to do this? There is so much to be done! It seems like whenever I manage to find a solution for a problem, three more pop up to take its place. And it's not helping that our current board of directors isn't exactly the smartest bunch I've ever worked with," he argued, sarcasm heavy in his voice.

Trowa's lips twitched again, suppressing a grin.

"Seeing that you've worked together with Gundam pilots and mobile suit mechanics in the past, I'm not exactly surprised by that," he offered dryly, making his lover pause and look at him, blinking and then finally breaking out into soft laughter. That was exactly the reaction Trowa had hoped for. While Quatre was used to his usually somewhat dry humor, he still managed to surprise him sometimes.

"Conceited much, aren't you?" the blond teased him, but the sting that had marred his earlier words was gone now, making Trowa give him another small smile. At that Quatre's shoulders slumped slightly down as the tension drained away.

"I've been an ass, haven't I?" he asked, obviously not really expecting an answer.

"Only a little," Trowa conceded, trying to keep the lighter mood now that his lover was ready to let go of his annoyance.

Standing up, Quatre walked towards the taller man, wrapping his arms around his neck and leaning in to peck his lips.

"Love me anyways?" he asked and earning himself an amused sparkle in those emerald eyes and another, somewhat deeper kiss, while Trowa's hands came to rest on his hip.

"Always."

And that was all that counted in the end.

**END**

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Like I said, a bit weird ^^; I hope you all liked it anyway^^;;  
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